Cats and Dogs
it started with a kipper that Uncle Tesco commanded to be spoilt a fish like a butterfly or inkblot folded that he caught on some azure sun drenched sea and togged in goggles and a leather hat with an aircraft not unlike the Bleriot bought the fish from its luxuriant basking home to me i loved the flesh of fish so much i ate a lot but not the bones and head and scapula and of course the penis that you called Roe discovering a Dilemma .. two postulates where there should be none the leftovers should be cast into "the bin of shame" and recycled ? when Council recycling is itself a misnomer, that it is ! OK so if ALL my neighbours ATE KIPPERS on the same day we might make a collective pot of glue with the bones but i have a far More Cerebral Idealogy a lot of my neighbours have dogs and cats and although they have allegedly Marginal Benefits for the OWNERS it increases our National Debt, uses up cans .... and all sorts of possibly innocent animals have to be made into food to keep their dogy and catty chums alive when really those chummybums should be out playing in a natural world where they can eat and might be eaten mmmmmm!!!!! Bonus so i left the remains of the kipper out on the kitchen work surface for a day or two to mature then by Ein Meister Stroke the sort to which i am Singularly Prone I put the now rather PONGY remains in my shoes knowing the Enticement and IRRESISTaBLILTY of the scent to dogz and catz i laughed HA HAHA HHA HAH HA HA !!! and then walked back and forth several times outside the houses of local people I KNEW to have PETS which made some curtains TWITCH before marching slowly and ponderously enough that mammals of a certain NOSE might follow round i went to the local Motor Car factors and took a box from outside their back door then proceeded carefully to the Post Office whence outside I took off my shoes and socks .. although I kept the plastic bags inside the socks on and put the shoes in the Car shop box and this is where i was, when i was struck by another Di-lllemma ... The Posting Paradox who am i going to Post the box containing my smelly old shoes and socks to ??? and I thought of Several answers 1) The Samaritans 2) The headquarters of Some major Religious Organisation 3) Randomly address the box " for the attention of Deli, Dehli, India 123" 4) Myself ... but then i might get involved in an INFINITE Postal Loop but being kind readers you might HELP with Aternative suggestions ????
Mike Burr ,